Marketeaing

Nov 29, 2007 · peterb · 1 minute read
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Being something of a tea snob, I’ve always been fascinated by the over the counter supermarket tea market, where companies like Celestial Seasonings can sell exactly the same junk product as Lipton but, through the power of a nice box design and some flavor text, command a huge premium in price.

Today it struck me: this is how I will get rich. I will market low quality teas in fine packaging. They will all have names that are sort of vaguely sexually suggestive without being actually crude. The mad cash will roll in.

I mentioned this scheme to some friends of mine, and one thing led to another and, well – I bet you know what’s coming next.

TOP FIFTEEN VAGUELY SEXUALLY SUGGESTIVE TEA NAMES

15. Morning Afterglow (peterb)

14. Afternoon Delight (peterb)

13. Hot and Bothered (rlink)

12. Rooibush (fpereira)

11. Keemun-a-my-house (peterb)

10. Sweet Caress (clamen)

9. Evening Repose (peterb)

8. Carpe Noctem (peterb)

7. Assam (sdavis)

6. Pearl Gray (fpereira)

5. Sensual-cha (psu)

4. Rose Hips (bhudson)

3. You-n-ann (bhudson)

2. Ginger Honey (bhudson)

1. Monk’s Blend (bhudson)